I want a legitimate reason as to why I haven’t posted on here in a month. I believe the title of this post gives a fairly good idea, but I never thought I could be hurt so badly by anyone. I’ve always had the mentality that I would never stop my life for anyone, much less for a male. But here I am, a month after he broke up with me, and still fairly heartbroken.
This is a bit of a difficult post for myself to write, because I really do hope that HE gets to see this one day, because he promised me that he would keep in contact, that we’d see each other again.
It’s been a month since I’ve seen him,
It’s been two weeks since I’ve heard from him.
I’m really beginning to wonder whether he ever did actually love me like he said he did, or if ever actually cared about me.
Now, it’s all down to ‘either he doesn’t love me anymore or he never did’.
So, since it’s been a month since he ended things so ridiculously abruptly, 2 days after we spent Valentine’s Day together, and a week after he met most of my Aunts and Uncles at a family party, I’ve decided I need to get my s**t together and try move on.
The title of this post is actually something I’ve googled. I’ll be real here, but what can a girl do when she doesn’t have any other choice? He was my best friend, and destroyed everything with a few words.
There has been many articles over the last few days I’ve read, and they all seem to say the same things;
- Recognise pain is normal
- Allow yourself time to grieve
- Take some time away from the other person
- Express your feelings to yourself
- Realize you are better off
- Avoid the blame game
- Get rid of the mementos
- Distract yourself
- Avoid memory triggers
- Talk it out with someone
- Strengthen your support systems
- Change up your routine
- Push yourself outside your comfort zone
- Get back into the game
- Stay encouraged
These are only some of the ideas for getting over someone that I’ve found on good old Google. A majority of these stages I don’t see myself reaching for quite a long time. There’s still nights where I do just want to be able to roll over in bed and be greeted by his embrace and it actually physically hurts me knowing that’s not a thing anymore.
He did say to me that we could get back together one day, that he just needs some time for himself, but at this point with no knowledge of how he’s doing, I find it highly unlikely it’ll be happening.
So, if he ever reads this, he needs to know that I have spent an entire month trying to hate him but have found it so incredibly impossible.